whatever it was that i ate, definitely did not go over well with me stomach. i had some food from my school and it always tastes like shit and gives me the runs, but this time was something g different. all i felt was bubbling inside my stomach for a half hour, get to the bathroom and a spray of Campbells chunky soup came right from my ass. it wouldn’t stop. i felt my stomach shrinking as i was watering the toilet seat. after it finally finished, it felt like i was wiping my ass with a Brillo pad. i didn’t want to get up from the toilet it was so bad.
Who Poisened The Water Hole
Shitty Striper
I wanted to confess one of the most embarrassing nights of my life, that ended horrible. Just so you can picture what I do for a living I am a stripper at Fantasy Island Showgirls – 11434 W Pico Blvd W, Los Angeles, CA – Los. I was wearing a beautiful get up (neon pink thong, push up bra, and sexy neon green fish nets.) I had a 5 hour shift before my Applebees job. My name is Candy Queen, I was dancing on the pole, being the star and all of a sudden felt a horrible pain in my stomach. I was trying to hide it, I had approximately 10 minutes more on the pole and didn’t want to disappoint my regulars. When all of a sudden I had to jump off the platform in high heels and make it to the back end of the building. People kept getting in my way trying to give me money and get a lap dance when I just couldnt get to the back right corner to the “ladies lounge” SHITTER. I couldn’t hold it any longer and I let it out it slid down my leg in front of approximately 50 guests around the vicinity. I lost my job and had to drop two of my classes in college. Just because one night. On the bright side I made 500 dollars that night, and still have applebees. Glad Toilet talk let me tell about the horrific night.
Car Bomb!
Lock the windows and the doors. Let it all out, no one can escape!
Football Shit
Durring my junior year of football I was on my way home from practice and I had to shit and I didn’t think I could hold it I live 10mins from my school so it was a far ride I finally got home ran to my bathroom and I dove at my toilet ass first and I slid off my toilet and before I hit the ground I shit I came so close to making it but ended up with a big mess and a even bigger one for my mom to clean up
Shit
I shit my pants in my bed and I don’t want to get up so I’ll deal with it in the morning
Drunken Shit
This was a relieving shit. I drank the night before and threw up. Now i just took a shit and the shit looked like an alien shit with like eyes and shit. Not drinking like that again….till tomorrow.
The One
Never took one like this. it was all hunky dory until that one stomach pain ill never forget kicked in. it was the worst i ever had. ran to the bathroom and it felt like the shit coming out never ended. There was a 3 foot log in the toilet that had a girth of about 2 inches in diameter. i don’t know how but ill never forget that shit.
Fat Terd
Is it weird that I’m so lazy & such a fat terd that I cut a whole in the bottom of my bed so when im laying down I can take a shit without having to get up and walk to the bathroom?
Indian Explosion
So my friend and I were working at school and we just so happen to be right outside the boys bathroom and in mid conversation, what we thought was a bomb that went off in the bathroom, was really an Indian taking the BiGgEST and DIRTIESt dump of his life. It went on for a half hour at least. And my friend and I had the pleasure of listening to the sweet sounds of this Indians wet asshole. Yum
Toilet tech
http://m.gizmodo.com/5845671/this-poop+powered-toiletcycle-is-touring-japan-in-october
had to share this link with everyone. It’s a shit-powered motorcycle made by the Japanese toilet company Toto. Completely self contained, no more bathroom breaks on roadtrips.
